I Do Not Forgive You, But I Will Forget

I want you to know that while I do not forgive you, because forgiving would imply that what you did was somehow acceptable, somehow okay, somehow not as hurtful as it is. I will forget you. I will forget about you entirely. I do not forgive you for forgetting me, I do not forgive you for letting me get lost in your world that was taken up entirely by other things, all of which were apparently more important. I don't forgive you for telling me that I can't be trusted because I said one thing I wasn't supposed to when I was 5. I don't forgive you for assuming that I will mess up every major deal because I didn't look into things with a phone bill when I was 18. I don't forgive you for assuming I was too stupid to get into a state college. I don't forgive you for forcing me to stay in the same high school when I asked you not once, but repeatedly, to transfer me out, because there was a high suicide rate, I had no friends going there, and I knew everything that was coming. I do not forgive you for conveniently forgetting about all the things that happened to me because you were unwilling to budge. I do not forgive you for never admitting when you were wrong. I do not forgive you for always seeing everybody else as better than me and more of a priority than me, and I do not forgive you for letting me fall between the cracks every time and choosing anybody else, even somebody you didn't even know when there was a choice. I do not forgive you for always taking the other side. I do not forgive you for fucking up my life and then taking no blame assuming it must have been anyone but you. But I will forget you. I will walk away, and I will never think about you ever again, I will never give you credit, I will never again blame you because you will not be a part of my life ever again, because otherwise, I don't think I can stand it and I don't think I will make it out alive.